that being my destination.

20090221

10:08 PM

if only we really embraced the idea of kingdom living. then these saturday things wont be such a chore to everyone. :(

argh i need to find a job to earn money so we can go holiday. and i wanted to go with niki to vietnam too. but seems like i probably wont be able to earn enough to pay for ballet, piano, driving lessons, transport, food, ... i miss dancing so often and feeling fit. i kinda feel like a slob now. haha. maybe i'll go back this wed. see how.

kapooey

&the joy.

3:36 PM

it's been a while since i've written. i dont know how often i will write anymore, but i do miss it much. life's suddenly be knocked out of it's usual routine. the mould is gone and each day is only how long i plan to do things in. this monotony is just so weird, so out of place that im not sure what i should be doing anyhows. im going to go look for a better skin.

i wish youth saturdays went better. but i guess only God can change things.

with valentines' day just passed i was reminded of this poem that stuck with me since we did it for lit in sec 2.

Valentine- Carol Ann Duffy

Not a red rose or a satin heart.

I give you an onion.
It is a moon wrapped in brown paper.
It promises light
like the careful undressing of love.

Here.
It will blind you with tears
like a lover.
It will make your reflection
a wobbling photo of grief.

I am trying to be truthful.

Not a cute card or kissogram.

I give you an onion.
Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips,
possessive and faithful
as we are,
for as long as we are.

Take it.
Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding ring,
if you like.
Lethal.
Its scent will cling to your fingers,
cling to your knife.

so fierce, so true.

&the joy.